November 16, 2017
That is what another working girl said to me a couple of years ago. I would have wanted to be friends with her but when she heard people call me smart and pretty she thought her business would suffer if I was around. She was always ready to undermine my hopes. I had met a nice truck over the weekend. For hours he just wanted me to watch hours of YouTube videos of fashion runway shows in my best outfit, my birthday suit. I liked him. He enjoyed my intelligence and I did not have to dumb down my language to look like an airhead and/or reassure him he was no airhead. I recounted my enjoyable and profitable Saturday night. Did she think I could have a friend in “J.”? One issue, when I expressed admiration for the physiques of running backs he agreed whole heartedly and added, “don’t they have the best asses in the world?” I joked with him that it was more than being a die hard Patriots fan that had him watching football in August. He appeared to be a bit homosexual but I wondered why he would have spent so much time with me. No he couldn’t be gay and I might have a new buddy who knew what I did and was cool with hanging out.
Cindy, my colleague, played her usual role of confidence underminer. No I did not have a friend in him. First of all you need to stop falling in love with the tricks. Second of all the homosexual inclination was obviously strong in him if he admitted his attraction. But all guys go there with the same sex. They start off experimenting as young teenagers. Whatever they did, like group masturbation, sometimes called a circle jerk, was never discussed aloud. Everyone knew but no one ever said. Sex and relationships with women and encounters with other men. Cindy said it was men’s way of showing themselves their need for women was minimal. Their secret acts made them feel powerful over women who did not know how truly temporary men’s desire was for women, expendable women. And if a man was peeking out of the closet where he hid his homosexuality by making a small remark as Jay had, well, that’s a man who probably had no relationship with a woman and did not want one. I felt deflated after we spoke bc I liked him. However I felt more intrigued about male homosexuality than ever before. All men? Willing to engage in secret acts all throughout their sex lives. It was time yo investigate. If there was a group of people u had access to it was men