No one missed my frequent posts, it seemed. There was no groundswell of objection. I disappeared as though i had never existed. In fact this was one response:
“Bravo. Fuck chicks on this site. This is our domain. A guys forum who talk about these providers we fuck and we don’t need no feed back from any working girl commentating or putting her two cents in fuck that. I go on reviews on what other mongers are saying who gives a shit what a provider will say.”
Wow, that was angry!
At first the harsh language shocked and I will shamefully admit, wounded my feelings. I try to pretend I am emotionally vacuum packed with no feelings leaking out and nothing getting past the barrier to hurt me. I would never say this to people, but I am monumentally sensitive. In time , the narcissist in me let go of the stranglehold on my thoughts and I analyzed the posts by women and posts about those providers. Women’s comments did change the site. Men started writing to the women who had posted. “No one compares to you,” for one example. Men postured instead of sharing useful info for the next guy, especially those who shared their user names with providers. They wanted the women to keep liking them and hopefully like them more. I know how sad the rejection of my anonymous persona made me. They are just like me! I never imagined having feelings in common with men but my stereotypes were shown to be invalid. I thought I was going to teach about wrong stereotypes with my site. I did not anticipate learning about my plentiful prejudices.
I was once by a homeless drug addict who watched the prostitution scene in downtown Honolulu about men who seek male providers. He said men drive downtown (Honolulu) to pick up streetwalking mahus (men who dress as women, self idebtify as women, and are always referred to as “she” by everyone) for more than closeted homosexuality. Women make some men uncomfortable. They want the easy camaraderie men enjoy together. Plus, women seem mean, definitely to each other and sometimes men. Sure he paid for her services and her time but he can’t buy a personality and he cannot purchase feeling safe. The admin was right. That site is one of the last bastions of free sppech, no matter how un-politically correct. The United States is in an era of limited free public speech.
Just look at how in 2018 politically conservative Google employees had to publicly fight (fight!) In the news/social media to hold non-liberal opinions within the left wing Google culture. This is America, where to me, freedom of speech implies freedom from having to listen to anyone. And yet, I contradicted my cherished support of the First Amendment by discouraging men from saying things I did not like. I was as bad as book burners in the distant past who literally stopped the free flow of ideas with a match. Today, idiot moves like my 2017 commentary come in the form of online, often anonymous, shaming. I did not listen to philosopher Nietzsche: when fighting monsters take care not to become one.
I did the logical thing–I got my own platform (You are here!) where I can say what I want, uncensored. No one has to read my provider opinions. I once made the rhetorical statement: who wants to listen to a whore? Amazingly, people do want to listen to this whore. I had hoped for five readers and didn’t know how even that would happen. Next post I will tell you of the amazing success 8 months has brought to ExpertEscort2018.com, where the ivy league meets the Honolulu streets.
3 responses to “Part II: Why my ban from Honolulu forum of an adult services site as a problematic provider was correct”
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Reblogged this on Harvard X-Streetwalker now Hawaii sex talker and commented:
I now understand that the female way of thinking is foreign to the hard core maleness of the online site that exists to help guys get laid. I was posting analyses, thoughts. I was not keeping to the purpose of providing info to help guys find a provider. Harsh as it was to hear, the administrator of the site was correct when he said no one cared about my thoughts. Not in that context. Sometimes men feel they need to hide their single mindedness in pursuing sex from women. If men thought there was a female reading their posts they might change what they write to put on a polite front. The site really could have been ruined as a place where one can see snapshots of the male mind when regarding the opposite sex. It was better that I got my own blog going so I can continue, to this day in June2020, go back to that site to see how men talk about women when they believe no women are present. Caroleena, reposting and adding new thoughts to a hit 2018 post.
Reblogged this on "Harvard" Hooker in Honolulu.