“Reverse Stings” Are Police Actions Targeting Potential Clients Not Hookers

I have read that when the Honolulu Police Department decides it is going to crack down on prostitution by going after the johns, they never, ever target the tourists. That would be so very bad for the tourism industry. Can you just imagine the shame of a Japanese businessman getting arrested for soliciting an undercover cop for prostitution. He would have to commit hari kiri ( just kidding, that is a practice from feudal Japan that allows a disgraced warrior to redeem himself by dying an honorable death after he disemboweled himself. It was not something one had to do, it was something one was privileged to do. Today, I think guys just jump off of buildings but I speak without any authority on the subject). What I do know is that Hawaii depends on tourist dollars and if tourists want to spend some of those dollars on prostitutes the authorities will not get in the way of commerce. However, HPD will conduct these reverse stings where tourists fear to tread, like downtown Honolulu, just off Chinatown. They probably wouldn’t get hurt because we are not a violent state, with a few recent and disturbing exceptions, but we are the #1 state for property crimes. In other words, come to Hawaii and something will be stolen from you. Especially downtown. Where cops go to catch local women and female-types offering a service to any takers, primarily local guys. That’s where HPD sets up with a decoy undercover female officer and a support team on the ready.

Good News for Guys–You Never Ever Have to Get Caught

It is important to know the law when you are planning to break it. This way, if at all possible, you can stay within the boundary of what is legal. The exchange of money is not illegal. The exchange of money made America great! What is illegal, in terms of prostitution, is the verbal agreement to exchange a specific good or service for a specific sex act. Once that agreement is made, that’s a bust. The moment an undercover verbally floats a proposition and you say “yes” you are under arrest. I do not know what they do if you say nothing, but I do know that if you give them a “no,” there is no deal and unless the cops are corrupt and are going to arrest anyone they want to arrest, you should be good. What kind of propositions have I heard, you ask: Examples from the true life experience of this x-streetwalker:

  1. $100 for everything ok?
  2. You offer full service?
  3. Can we do what we did last time?
  4. Do I need to bring condoms?
  5. You like date? (this one is pidgin, the colloquial language of Hawaii)
  6. Can me and my friend go one after another?
  7. I just want a bj, is that ok?
  8. I will give you $300 up front if you will just reassure me that we will have sex for that money.
  9. I know I said I was giving you the $100 since you came all the way out here, but now that I think of it, can I get head for that? (I kept the $100 as I made a bee line for the door).
  10. Do you offer gfe, he, cim, bbbj, dining at the Y? I could go on. I feel rather proud of myself bc I don’t know slang, but after thoroughly perusing the urban dictionary I feel qualified to use these terms. No, you are not protected from arrest if you say how many roses instead of how many dollars, for example, bc the slang is standardized and everyone knows what you mean. One of the dangers of using slang is that people won’t know what you mean and you may be misinterpreted and thought to be looking for a bomb and not a sexual encounter, so slang can really backfire on you!

What to do when you are propositioned verbally, or through email, or text

You must correct the person immediately and bluntly. You must say “no,” and vehemently too. No one will believe a vague denial. After all, if someone asked you if you want to help them cut down that tree over there, you would make it clear that you would not. To someone not looking for sex, such a proposition is anywhere from ridiculous to appalling to offensive and you have to react accordingly. I can sometimes lack tact, and I would not encourage you to follow my example. Perhaps a “no” tempered with “I am sorry you misunderstood me. I am interested in [insert legal activity here].” Such as filming an adult movie for entertainment purposes only. Or taking pictures. I don’t think it is illegal to be nude with someone in your own home, but I am not an attorney, so I would double check this advice, but I think you can read poetry in the nude with someone, no sex act involved. Can you ask someone to come watch porn with you? I would imagine so, since pornography is legal in this country, but again, confirm with an expert. Now that I think of it, there is a reason I am as brusque as I am. A simple “no thank you, sorry you got the wrong idea,” will suffice.

Wait? How do we come to terms?

I know it is ridiculous but you cannot come to terms. People who know what time it is will never ever say those things and they will never ask for details. People new to the scene should follow the example of who they are dealing with, and if they are so new that they don’t know better than to speak in illegal terms, well, it is up to you how obligated you feel to teach the young ones. Let someone else break in the clueless newbies, bc if they are not newbies, the consequences are lifelong, potentially life destroying. They will ask for a ride, offer a ride, agree on a rendezvous place and time, and that is it. Pretty unbelievable that consenting adults have to play these games, but when you are not a moneyed tourist that is what you must do. You never know who is an undercover, or what is far more likely here, you never know when someone you once dealt with has been caught and is now cooperating with the police. This form of betrayal happens. ALL. THE. TIME. That’s why you must never deviate from the standard practice of saying nothing, even with people you think you know.


Watch out for someone you think you know who breaks your usual pattern and starts narrating, as if speaking for an audience, saying things like, “so you are going to give me “x,” as long as I give you “y.” Quickly correct this person, friend-type though you may believe her to be, and say “no.”


I will give you a hint. The reason guys can always spot an undercover has everything to do with the superior strength men have over women. Stay Tuned…To Be Continued

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