You do not know what you will say before you say it, one amazing truth

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Answer to How can some people be okay with how they treat people? by Caroleena Renee https://www.quora.com/How-can-some-people-be-okay-with-how-they-treat-people/answer/Caroleena-Renee?ch=99&share=a22c124d&srid=1LASI

As a person who spent a lot of time as a member of groups people viewed with disdain, I tried to console myself with notions of superiority. I used my words to put others down and convince myself I should do this BC they deserved it. I changed my ways by changing my speech. Are you ever worried that you might be the one mistreating people and you do not know it? Here’s a method to keep your thought life appropriate for the kind person you are or will become. There are people towards whom you feel annoyance or disdain. Do you want to be nicer to them? Always use a person’s name, if you know it. One way FBI profilers pick the culprit out of a group of suspects is, they listen for the person who refers to the missing wife as “she” or “her” and the missing kids as “them.” Seemingly innocent statements made during media interviews are quite revealing when you hear the repetition. Words said during the statement like, “I miss them” and “I want her back” are obvious clues that really did point to the guilty part. You can apply this seemingly irrelevant data to your own ways. Once you know what to watch for in your speech you will be amazed at the words you speak without knowing what you are about to say. That’s why we have to listen to ourselves. We are always surprised by what we say and by our own lack of info beforehand. It’s like one part of the brain knows what you are about to say while the rest of you waits to find out what it us. You can never be as kind as you want unless you pay attention to yourself and reflect on your words later. Try it!