I sheepishly admit to being jealous of a sexy, beautiful, smart woman who is what I am not–successful

https://www.msn.com/en-us/sports/nba/olympian-allyson-felix-says-nike-was-beyond-disrespectful-when-asking-her-to-be-in-female-empowerment-ads-while-privately-disputing-maternity-protections/ar-AALVdic?ocid=winp1taskbar

Jealousy is on of America’s taboos

People get jealous. But we are not supposed to be jealous. We are supposed to be bigger than jealousy, to want the best for others, to applaud the success we ourselves never attained. It is also taboo to admit that we have reason to be jealous because we have fallen short in our own estimation or in that of other people who pass on the belief in our inferiority to us. And we certainly do not, not ever, admit to being in the grip of something the Germans have a word for–schadenfreude–taking delight at the misfortune of others, especially the misfortune of our betters.

Hawaii Street Life: I admit to enjoying living off track and doing things I never would have imagined myself knowing about, much less mastering. I enjoyed my life. But the after effects were neither anticipated nor considered. One of the after effects is that a life pursuing emptiness leaves one with nothing, a nothingness that can be symbolized by the empty spaces on my resume . “I could not translate ‘former sex worker’ into a marketable skill I could put on a Facebook Easy Apply for a particular job,” said one woman who had been on the street for over thirty years and is now teaching other aging former sex workers how to transition from prostitution to pan handling. She is trying to figure out how to make this unofficial underground job training applicable to the above ground working world. And as for me, I am hoping to find success writing about all of these women and myself in order to turn things around for me, and in time, for them too. I am shallow. I wish I were the bigger woman because the bigger woman does not seem tormented by shallow concerns but I have always been the smaller woman. I hope this brutal honesty speaks to you, belovedreaders rather than puts you off.

IN THE LINK BELOW YOU WILL FIND AN ARTICLE THAT REACHED OUT AND GRABBED ME AS BEING RELEVANT TO MY LIFE, BUT YOU MIGHT FIND IT HARD TO SEE WHAT I COULD HAVE IN COMMON WITH SOMEONE WHO COULD BE FEATURED IN ANY ARTICLE, BUT BEAR WITH ME. THIS ARTICLE IS ABOUT AN OLYMPIC RUNNER FEATURES A WOMAN DOING WHAT I WANT TO DO, WHICH IS SPEAKING OUT FOR WHAT IS RIGHT FOR WOMEN AND CHILDREN. BUT SHE IS COMING FROM A P0SITION OF ADVANTAGE COMPARED TO ME.  SHE IS SUCCESSFUL.  I HAVE A LOT TO SAY ALRIGHT BUT AS A SOCIAL PARIAH, EX CON, ADDICT, FORMER STREET PERSON, THERE ARE THOSE WHO WILL NOT TAKE ME SERIOUSLY, TO SERIOUSLY UNDERSTATE THE OBVIOUS. I HAVE HAD A DEPTH OF FAILURE SO GRIPPING I HAVE NOT THE BRAVERY TO SHARE ALL OF MY MISTAKES WITH MY BELOVED READERS WHO HAVE FOLLOWED MY BLOG, HAWAII STREET LIFE, HTTPS:EXPERTESCORT2018.COM.  IN THIS SPACE I ATTEMPT TO SEE IF A PERSON CAN TURN LEMONS INTO LEMONADE BY SHARING WITH OTHERS MY EXPERIENCES AS A HARVARD GRAD ON THE ADDICTION DRIVEN STREETS OF DOWNTOWN HONOLULU.  I HAVE MUCH TO TEACH, AND IF YOU DON’T FIND ANYTHING I SAY EDUCATIONAL, I GUARANTEE YOU WILL FIND IT FASCINATING TO READ OF GRITTY , BOTTOM OF THE BARREL STREET LIFE SPOKEN OF IN THE HOITY TOITY LANGUAGE OF ACADEMIA. I AM THE ONE WITH THE HOITY TOITY LANGUAGE AS I MADE MYSELF AT HOME IN THE BOTTOM OF THE BARREL.  I SO WANTED TO MAKE THE EXPERIENCE OF SOMEONE WHO DID THINGS TO GET DRUGS THAT SHE HAD, IN YOUNGER DAYS, ONLY SAW ON PBS SPECIALS THAT BEGAN WITH WARNINGS ABOUT CONTENT BEING INAPPROPRIATE FOR YOUNG AUDIENCES.

   https://www.msn.com/en-us/sports/nba/olympian-allyson-felix-says-nike-was-beyond-disrespectful-when-asking-her-to-be-in-female-empowerment-ads-while-privately-disputing-maternity-protections/ar-AALVdic?ocid=winp1taskbar